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Old 12-12-2008, 09:43 AM
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Whitetail_Freak_Hunter Whitetail_Freak_Hunter is offline
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Default Thinks to ponder about

For those who love the philosophy of ambiguity, as well as the idiosyncrasies of english:

1. Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.

2. One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor.

3. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

4. If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys
and apes?

5. The main reason that santa is so jolly is because he knows where
all the bad girls live.

6. I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, 'where's the self-
help section?' she said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.

7. What if there were no hypothetical questions?

8. If a deaf person signs swear words, does his mother wash his hands
with soap?

9. If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself,
is it considered a hostage situation?

10. Is there another word for synonym?

11. Where do forest rangers go to 'get away from it all?'

12. What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an
endangered plant?

13. If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?

14. Would a fly without wings be called a walk?

15. Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will
clean them?

16. If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?

17. Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?

18. If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right
to remain silent?

19. Why do they put braille on the drive-through bank machines?

20. How do they get deer to cross the road only at those yellow road
signs?

21. What was the best thing before sliced bread?

22. One nice thing about egotists: They don't talk about other people.

23. Does the little mermaid wear an algebra?

24. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?

25. How is it possible to have a civil war?

26. If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest drown too?

27. If you ate both pasta and antipasto, would you still be hungry?

28. If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?

29. Whose cruel idea was it for the word 'lisp' to have 's' in it?

30. Why are hemorrhoids called 'hemorrhoids' instead of 'assteroids'?

31. Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?

32. Why is there an expiration date on sour cream?

33. If you spin an oriental person in a circle three times, do they
become disoriented?

34. Can an atheist get insurance against acts of god?
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Old 12-12-2008, 10:33 AM
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HuntingGal&HuntingKid HuntingGal&HuntingKid is offline
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ok those were good .
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Old 12-12-2008, 11:00 PM
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KTL KTL is offline
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Nice WFH.......SO WHAT WAS THE BEST THING SINCE SLICED BREAD. Anybody know, always wondered that same question.
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Old 12-14-2008, 11:21 PM
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buckfever buckfever is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by KTL View Post
Nice WFH.......SO WHAT WAS THE BEST THING SINCE SLICED BREAD. Anybody know, always wondered that same question.
Crunchy Peanut Butter!!!!! and then i got alot more on my list of goodies to eat..
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Old 12-16-2008, 08:33 PM
Beaux Beaux is offline
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Im a teacher and a coach and every class period I try to start the class off writing something on the board for the kids to write about that makes them think. Im going to print this off and use one a day for this activity. Thanks man you just helped me with my job.
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